Yes, I'm going crazy. just going crazy thinking of you.
Yes, you are like a drug, so toxic, so dangerous, so damaging.
That.. i just can't seems to pull myself away..
Yes. Something about you is so addictive. I don't know what is it. 
Your smile? Your character? or just you? I don't know.

I know I've tried, tried to walk away from you, maybe not hard enough.
Tried to walk away from your concerns, your messages, and it is getting harder.
As much as I know how wrong this is, I want it. I want it so much so I'm losing control of myself.

I'm not supposed to. I'm supposed to stay away before things happen.
But I'm not, and perhaps, part of me..want it to happen.
& I'm actually not resisting it the way I should.
What am i thinking... every brain cell in me is thinking of you. Every. Single. One.
You seems to know it. You seems to sense it.
Are you feeling the same way too? Self control?
I'm afraid, afraid I might lose it soon.
I cannot do this anymore. Tell me how to stop.
I want to see you everyday. & I mean it. Everyday.

& whats with the "喂我“ & " gaowei when you see me ?heart gao wei huh?"
What are you thinking when you said that, laughing like you enjoyed it when I turned and walked off.
Friends told me i should stay away, Well hell yes, I know I should. EASIER SAID THAN DONE!


Tell me. What to do. To kick off this drug.
It's so wrong. I'm attached. But feeling really empty with my boy.

Feeling really down recently..
Dunno what am i doing..
So it's cool off period between us..
一开始就是错误吗？一开始就不该爱上你吗？
就不能为我改那么一点点？一点都不行？
为什么呢。。　非要我爱上别人才后悔吗？
为了我，　就不能再努力一点吗？
但你应该不会后悔吧。。。反正你都看不到我们的未来。。
你的未来就只有你自己，没有我。

四年了，原以为也许能改变你的想法。。看来更坚决了。我也累了。。。

我真的乱了吗， 疯了吗？
真的不知道自己在想什么。。整颗心好沉重。重到真的几乎快不能呼吸了。
真的好累人。

一直在问自己， 是因为失望吗？
还是一种习惯， 或者我变了。但为什么总是问不出答案。
我只知道， 我很喜欢， 很享受这样的生活。也许是这一刻而已，但是我真的很厌倦。
厌倦被捆束的感觉。 我渴望我的自由， 但却又不想解脱。
被捆绑在这一切当中， 是我活该； 是我自找的。


再美的玫瑰也会凋谢， 
再美的爱情也会变质。
这世界还有什么是值得相信的。

这么多年了， 你一刻也没有为我改变过你的想法。
我算什么呢。。

不能呼吸， 不能真正的笑。